Heart Reading … Day 27

Straining to hear whispers.

My days have been a bit frenetic recently and I’m feeling like I am losing the connection to the messages from my heart. They are always somewhat elusive whispers, but ones I manage to hear; overscheduling and not breathing well during the moments I do take here and there are complicating matters.

With that being said, I’m wondering if what wants to be written right now is coming from my head or my heart. I want to write about the episode I just watched of The L Word: Generation Q (thinking I was watching S1E1 I ended up watching the most recent episode in season 2) because the essence of loving large depicted by one character in particular (the one confronted at the altar) is up for me. And I’m going to let that statement just stand here.

I want to hold onto the weirdness of bringing my lunch out to the basketball court today — while two guys were playing — and sitting their eating and occasionally smiling at them. I want to appreciate the deep connection I have with my dog and the way we know what each other needs, like really easeful NVC. I want to thank the heavens for putting me to sleep when I toss and turn and then waking me up with just enough time to shower and make my meeting looking fairly put together. And I want to pour my heart out to birds and trees and other sentient beings who I believe have wisdom and compassion that I can only dream of having someday.

Not one of these heart readings is complete without stringing a number of moments together to actually hand-on-heart do a reading. She reminded me of the sadness… and how this is propelling me to redefine what “little wins” look like — and to be careful not to lose sight of others’ hearts. Great advice.